In Memoriam, Y.

I'm supposed to get up here 

And say, "Boy, you've got class!" 

You're so full o' fuckin' talent

That it drips outta your crack!

That if you follow your dreams 

It'll all come to pass

"This here's a meritocracy!"

Man, get your head outta your ass. 

IT IS NOT.

Good morning.

I had a privileged life, AND I got lucky, AND I'm unhappy.

What, you want to make sense

AND talk in rhyme?

Fine, this is it, here it goes,

You ungrateful fucking swine.

It's puberty and 

Growing pains,

Having political "opinions", and a 

Growing sense of shame

It's Anderson Cooper

On C-N-friggin'-N

What a fine arse on that man, 

Can I get an amen?!

Masturbation on a daily basis

(My girlfriend only got us past two bases)

There's hentai and octopii
Unnecessarily fetishized

American Psycho 101 says 
Read a book by Freud!

(I had a weird dream about an uncle, okay bitch? Sue me.)

Oh gosh darn, it happened again,

I slipped outta rhyme, 

And hurt your wee brain

This is the problem, though, let me to give it to you straight

(Though I'm bent as a faggot), 

Bitch, lemme illustrate

The problem

With this

Generation 

Is not

Social media or misandry

Or exponential moral rot

Or the kids who don't 

Like the Pope anymore

He's a swell guy, really, 

But I just wanna elope

With my hell-bound girl, and bottle of 'shine

Netflix and chill, that's the new party line

But the party's stopped cold

There's bombs at the door

There's blood on the floor

The NRA is on every 

World leader's honor roll

Even Chaning Tatum couldn't beat

This fucking gun show

There's good boys in jail for committing the crime

Of being born in President Donald Trump's time

Once you go black, you get shot in the back

Try to breathe, 

But you can't, you can't, you can't.

This is beginning to hurt, as I start to speak

This hurts all the little parts of me

This is the story of the generation raised to believe

That if you try just a little, you might be on TV!

So all the girls are off showin' their new tits

On some kinda wacko 'empowerment' kick

Which, when you think about it, really, what a great business model

Make a sex tape! Ask Kardashian! It all works out in the long run! :) 

They're tellin' us it's fine, kids, it's all good

There's a McD's and an Exxon in every neighbourhood!

Because, come on, guys, haven't any of you heard?

Climate change isn't real!

....Al Gore, damn, you tried man, you really did, that's all that counts. Fuck 'em bro, what do they know, right?

(Whoops, my bad,
Getting back on track)

A little bit of context, here, if you didn't know about this -

Al Gore made "Global Warming" a part of your thesaurus

All the world went, goddamn, that deserves an Oscar
All of America went, 
Um.
Nah.

And if you still don't get it, let's get a bit deeper

(haha thats what he said) (Ugh, I need to find Jesus)

Just 2 degrees hotter, you idiot pendejo, 

Is a LOT! It's a planet, not a shitty breakfast burrito.

There's a kid already born, who is going to die

Because of catastrophic planet failure

This ain't a fuckin' lie

We've got epidemics of obesity

And at the same time,

African kids starve to death, just down the line.

Explain that one to me, and while you're at it

Serve up some bullshit about saturated fatty acids

"A New Study Shows Ham's Good for your Heart"

And if you wanna fasttrack to hell... It'll do it's part.

At least, that's what I read in the book of the Lord

Not that One, not Him either, no, I mean the other Guy

The real one that's really sitting in the sky

Judging us for all of our sins and our lube
Damning us for our 'exponential moral rot'

Preaching hate to the choir, during Sunday school
The all-loving, merciful, genocidal little snot

But

It's fine, it's okay, I've drunk the Kool-Aid

Apparently, we're all 
Riding the same highway

We're paying our dues, and getting fucked in our asses

We've got Oculus lenses and backstage passes

To this grand fucking shitshow you birthed us into

You fought too many wars and killed too many Jews

You burnt too much coal and raped too many women

You don't even realize the things we've forgiven

So let us be, 

This ain't your part

Give us some time

To go back to the start

Exeunt right.

Now.



This was written in memory of You.

___

Several lines of this poem have been lifted verbatim from various sources; other have inspired various stanzas. All are listed below:

(1) Bo Burnham, "Make Happy", Netflix, 2016.
(2)Davis Guggenheim, "An Inconvenient Truth", Screenplay by former Vice President Al Gore, 2006
(3) Stephen Fry, "QI", Series G: Episode 11: "Gifts": Part III, With Clive Anderson, Jimmy Carr and Jan Ravens, BBC One, 2009
(4) Bernie Sanders, "It's Not Over", With Erica Garner, February 2016
(5) Alan Poul,"The Newsroom", Season 3: Episode 3: "Main Justice", HBO, 2014
(6) Brad Bird, "Tomorrowland", Walt Disney Pictures, 2015
(7) Alfred, Lord Tennyson, "In Memoriam A.H.H.", 1849